Constructive Conversations Using Moral Courage
Why is it so difficult these days to have respectful and productive conversations about polarizing issues? It seems that something has changed over the last several years. Everywhere we look, whether it be on social media, in the news, or in our own workplaces and families, conversations quickly escalate into confrontations. What’s going on?
Enter the Moral Courage Project, a not-for-profit training program founded by acclaimed author, filmmaker, and university professor Irshad Manji. Its mission is to “build a diverse community that teaches people to engage productively about polarizing issues.” The Moral Courage Mentor Certification program provides the perfect opportunity to help us answer our questions and equip us to teach the skills of Moral Courage to our school community.
Our journey towards certification as Moral Courage Mentors began last spring. Over the course of four months, we took a deep dive into the psychological, neurobiological, and social factors that make it difficult to have constructive conversations about contentious issues. Most importantly, we learned how to have constructive conversations by consistently practicing the 5 skills of Moral Courage.
This course provided many opportunities for both of us to identify our own unproductive communication habits and intentionally replace them with the healthier habits of Moral Courage. Amy grappled with how to confidently share her viewpoint rather than simply agree during challenging conversations. Now, she is more proactive about sharing her perspective in conversations after taking the time to listen and learn from others. This allows for a more effective and shared approach to addressing challenging situations. What she’s learned through her Moral Courage experience has had a direct, positive impact on her relationships as well as her ability to creatively problem-solve.
Griffin discovered the power of asking sincere questions and listening before jumping in to share his own thoughts. As the coach of the basketball team and coming from a family of lawyers who love to debate and go for the “win", he learned that winning in a conversation didn’t mean someone had to lose. Moral Courage taught him that, by first seeking to understand the other person, he in turn is more likely to be understood. Since he began using these skills, both he and his students have been experiencing better outcomes.
Our ultimate goal is to use these skills to train others on how to have healthy outcomes to contentious conversations. Interested in learning more? Here are two Moral Courage case studies from fellow Certified Mentors. Read about a mom who used the skills of Moral Courage to help her 14-year-old daughter engage productively in a tense family situation. And read how a teen used the skills of Moral Courage to improve mental health.
